Tom and Jerry: Defenders of All Things Right and Good

Thursday, January 31, 2008

Things They Don't Cover In Marriage Prep Class, Final Installment

As I prepare to leave for Tom's wedding, I conclude my marriage prep series for Tom. I've tried to prepare him for some of the little things I've discovered in my short time as a married man. Here are a few more tidbits:

> The first 6 months or so is the "Honeymoon Period". After this, according to marriage experts, comes a period of "power struggles". This period is supposed to last a couple of years. The "power struggles" for Lynda and I lasted approximately 20 minutes. I lost.

> If you see an attractive woman on TV, it is OK to mention to your wife that said woman is attractive, as long as you follow it with "She looks like you."

> A great thing about being married? Every morning, as I begin to wake up, I become aware of a warm body next to me. I roll over and see a pair of brown eyes, with nothing but love and affection reflected in them, gazing longingly at me. I can see who much she loves me, how much she wants my attention and affection....

Then Lynda comes out of the bathroom and tells the dog to get off the bed, and for me to get my lazy butt up and get to work.

> Seriously, though.........Married sex is different than any 'experience' you may have had when you were single. For starters, you don't feel guilty and you don't need to go to confession later. Mostly, though, it's because I feel completely "there", and because I see my wife as a person instead of a mountain that I've reached the top of. I don't feel the need to fret over performance, because I'm not 'competing' with anyone else she may have 'been with': I'm the only husband she's ever had, and since for Lynda, like most women, physical intimacy is more about the 'intimacy' than the 'physical', to her I'm the greatest lover who's ever walked the earth.

> Remember that the 'courting' of your lady is never over. Flowers, little love notes, the occasional stuffed animal - all these go a long way toward reminding her that you don't take her for granted.

> Tell the Pope I said 'Hi'.

Happy Honeymoon!!!!



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